posted 04 Aug 2012, 05:53
1) There's no magic number about how many hours you are supposed to have. Take what you can get
2) If you own a kitten they suck your lifeforce from you as you sleep
3) 4 hours of sleep is not enough no matter what someone tells you.
4) People who sleep with their eyes open carry the zombie apocalypse virus
5) People only dream when in REM? That is bullcrap..some scientist stated there is never a moment when sleeping that we do not dream. I am that scientist.
6) Dreaming is a mechanism to store experiences into memory say a certain scientist (me again..hey this is my blog i can make stuff up)
7) It's a myth you needs sleeping pills to cure insomnia. The truth is you need massive quantities of alcohol or quaaludes.
8) There was a study that shining a bright light at the back of your knee resets your brain's circadian clock.
9) Bats sleep upside down but are rudely woken up when pee pee stings their eyes
10) Dolphins can sleep using one side of their brain while the other side does stuff, like dressing up like sharks and biting humans then yelling, "The shark did it!!!"
11) Ants sleep for one minutes at a time
12) Staying awake over 17 hours straight is the same as being drunk. So don't drive while sleepy.
13) All Americans are issued a bed gun safe like the one below
14) Did you read all this stuff or just the first few lines you lazy bastards.
15) Siesta's are a proven necessity for maximum alertness. We are bi-phasic which means we go both ways
16) A daily 20 minute nap can restore your energy and some companies now have relaxation rooms with happy endings. You still aren't reading this are you, you lazy bastards.
17) Sleep apnia kills 600 people per minute. Symptoms are snoring and farting and wearing a snorkel to bed can fix this. Serious though, apnia kills so if there's lots of snoring seek help
18) There is no 18 so leave a snarky comment for what 18 should be
Here's a sleeping kitten