SirSeedsAlot52689Super User
Top 10 Lies Women Tell Their Menposted 21 Aug 2012, 12:361) You are right
2) You are perfect 3) Nothing is wrong 4) I love sports 5) I like your friends 6) I like your family 7) Money doesn't matter 8) You are good in bed 9) It doesn't bother me when you look at other women 10) Don't worry it happens to everyone Article Source http://milehightopsites.com/5280edge/2009/04/relationship-tips-top-10-common-lies-told-by-women/ Funny stuff haha I am surprised "size doesn;t matter" isn;t on the list... Kittens lie too.. Who mees? Mees not know what happened to dat tuna mees was napping all day...  |
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Top Comments
1. “I don’t have a girlfriend/wife.” Oh, yeah? Well, you sure look like you do.
2. “I’m not drunk.” Dude, we can smell the PBRs on your breath from here. Give us a break. ‘Fess up to your booze fest.
3. “I’m not looking for a relationship right now.” Translation: “I’m not looking for a relationship with YOU right now.” That’s OK. We’re on to the next one.
4. “I don’t want to talk about it.” If the most common lie women tell is, “I’m fine,” the male version is, “I don’t want to talk about it.” Yes, you do. In fact, you already are.
5. “I’m not interested in you just for the sex
6. “I always wear a condom.” Also, Santa Claus is real. And I’m dating the Easter Bunny. And Thomas Jefferson is my BFF.
7. “I’m leaving her for you.” Quit talking about it and do it already.
8. “I’ll call you.” O RLY?
9. “I don’t think she’s that pretty.” We love it when you lie like this. Tell this lie all the time. This lie is good.
10. “I don’t watch porn.”
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
God replied, "Your request is materialistic; think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "God, I wish that I, and all men, could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, why she snaps and complains when I try to help, and how I can make a woman truly happy."
God replied: "You want two lanes or four each way on that bridge...?"
When they say nothing is wrong they really mean everything is wrong, and you should be very, very worried
All Comments
Especially 1-10
2) You are perfect - or that.
3) Nothing is wrong - When I say that, its actually true.
4) I love sports - some of it yeah.
5) I like your friends - perhaps some of them.
6) I like your family - Doubt it.
7) Money doesn't matter - Depends.
8) You are good in bed - Depends.(Can always "train" you tho.
9) It doesn't bother me when you look at other women - No it dont, cuse i will look at other men. Deal with it.
10) Don't worry it happens to everyone - True. But not a lie.
So no, i dont lie, im honest.
The husband, finding this funny, suggests that his wife tease the poor primate. The husband suggests she pucker her lips, wiggle her bottom at him, and play along. She does, and the gorilla gets even more excited, making noises that would raise the dead. Then, the husband suggests that she let one of the straps to her dress fall to show a bit more skin.
She does and Mr. Gorilla nearly tears the bars down. “Now, lift your dress up to your thighs and sort of fan it at him,” says the man. She does, driving the gorilla absolutely crazy to the point at which he starts doing flips.
Then, the husband grabs his wife, throws open the door to the cage, slings her in with the gorilla and slams the cage door shut.
“Now tell HIM you have a headache.”
Meaning: "Of course it's you. I'm perfect"