posted 20 Jun 2012, 14:48
Well ,i thought to post hilarious Rajnikant's jokes(FANS DONT MIND AND FELLOWS ENJOY):-
1.Rajinikanth counted to infinity. Twice
2.Once Rajinikanth raced with time, time is still running.
3.When Alexander Graham Bell first used his telephone, he realized that he already had two missed calls from Rajinikanth.
4.When ghosts go camping, they sit around the fire and tell stories about Rajinikanth.
5.Once a media guy asked Rajini: "Don't you get angry after seeing these ridiculous jokes on you?" Rajini replied: "Do you think they are jokes?"
6.Rajinikanth can drown a fish
7.If RAJINI touches live electric wire, entire sub-station gets electrocuted!
8.Rajinikanth runs until the treadmill gets tired.
9.Great mystery solved : the missing piece of apple in Apple's Logo was eaten by Rajnikant!
10.One day a snake bit Rajnikanth on his leg. After 5 days of excruciating pain the snake died.
11.Rajnikanth never acted in a Hollywood movie because Hollywood can't afford Rajnikanth!
12.When Rajini falls into water, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Rajini-ed.
13.Rajinikanth changed his colour to black to absorb maximum UV rays and protect earth.
14.Intel's new ad: Rajinikanth Inside!
15.One day Rajini thought to play cricket in monsoon and the rain stopped due to play.
16.Rajinikanth wears sunglasses to protect sun from his eyes.
17.Rajinikanth got 150 questions in exam paper asking - "Solve any 100 questions" He solved all 150 and wrote, " Rascalla!, CHECK ANY 100!"
18.Why does needle of magnetic compass always point towards North??? . . Because, RAJINIKANTH lives in the South and no one has guts to point at him!!!
19.RAJINIKANTH knows those two persons who shook their hands in Nokia!!
20.Rajini once played badminton ,the shuttle he hit,went through the atmosphere tearing open the biggest hole in ozone,shattering the second moon of earth,taking the created debris with itself and shedding it in between Mars and Jupiter(creating the asteroid field),skimmed above the Jupiter's atmosphere(creating a storm that is still on from 300 years),went through the side of Uranus(rotating it in the opposite direction) and finally hit Pluto(sending it out of solar system).
21.When Rajinikanth sky dives....the earth wears a helmet.
22.Rajinikanth's pulse is measured in Richter scale.
23.Principal: What do you want to become in future? Student: After studying MBBS, I want to join Police force & get good job in a good software company and work as lawyer and construct big buildings and conduct research and become an actor... Principal: Hey, What's your name? Student: "The Rajinikanth"!!
24.Rajinikanth once had a race with Light.. Light came third.. Well Rajini's shadow was Second.
25.Only once in history has Rajinikanth snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang!
26.Yuvraj can hit only 6 sixes in an over but Rajinikanth can hit 12!
27.Rajinikanth's next movie... TITANIC in Tamil. Climax revised. Both survive. Rajini swims Atlantic ocean, Heroine in 1 hand &.. Titanic in other hand...!!
28.Rajinikanth's lunch was stolen during a camping trip. No one has seen Big Foot ever since.
29.Rajinikanth doesn't read your mind, he tells it what to do.
30.If RAJINI says "Sorry", he can make dead man alive !
31.Once Rajinikanth was caught on the highway for over speeding...while walking!
32.The Dead Sea was once alive before Rajinikanth bathed there.
33.Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
34.The Black Eyed Peas were originally named "The Peas"....until they met Rajinikanth.
35.Rajinikanth drove an Ambassador car in a Formula1 Race and won!
36.Rajini adopted 2 horses, 2 camels, 2 elephants from zoo.. Do you know why? To play chess!
37.Rajinikanth once scared a baby. To this day that baby is still screaming in fear......his name is Justin Bieber
38.Rajinikanth is the only one who drank the milk from the milky way in the galaxy
39.Rajinikanth can send can mms from a landline phone
40.Rajinikanth is the only person who can Hit laughing dog in DUCK HUNT game.
41.Rajinikanth frequently donates blood. Just never his own.
42.Lunar eclipses occur when Rajinikanth has a staring contest with the sun and it flinches.
43.Rajinikanth can paste something before he copies it.
44.One day Rajnikanth got angry with his mother and threw away the dinner set. Today people refer to its pieces as flying saucers!
45.Ranjinkanth played basketball on the moon and now moon has craters.
46.When Rajinikanth was a Student, Teachers use to Bunk the classes!!!
47.When Rajinikanth does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He is pushing the earth down.
48.Aishwairya Rai to Rajinikanth: Ek chutki sindoor ki kimat tum kya jaano rajni babu??? Rajinikanth: 0.000000078650000123478956 Rupees. MIND IT!!!
49.Rajinikanth filmed the making of the first camera.
50.While playing once Rajini said 'Statue' to a girl and now that girl is called "The Statue of Liberty".