SPAM SPAM SPAM - For Just Raving On About Nothing!14 July 2011, 11:47 (1 year ago)
4410 replies before
That looks like fun..! (bunch of dumb asses) There’s a serious problem with drinking and driving on our roads these days, but it isn’t with alcohol. It’s coffee. Addled by double-doubles, blinded by the drive-through signs, these caffeine addicts are making it even harder to get through a day’s drive unscathed. And all because they must get Timmies!
You’re now taking your life in your hands if you walk or drive past one of these places. These addicts are so fixated on the driveway entrance, they seldom bother to glance sideways as they cross lanes and bludgeon their way through traffic. Must get Timmies! They’re oblivious to the screeching of brakes or the honking of horns, and if an oncoming vehicle happens to break through their hot-drink haze, they simply gaze blankly, as if someone has just chastised them for breathing. I’m going to get Timmies! Everyone else must stop for me! If there isn’t enough room for all the cars in the drive-through, as often happens, they simply line up six or seven deep on the street. Must get Timmies! If they’re turning left into the drive-through, they jam their cars sideways across the oncoming lanes and block the entire road, lest someone making a right-hand turn get in line before them. Must get Timmies! Even if there is oncoming traffic, they still snap their turn. You’ll stop before you T-bone me. I’m on my way for Timmies! Once they have their fix, they must now get back on the road. It’s not necessary to look both ways, or even stop if someone is coming. I have my Timmies. I am invincible. Of course, the one who suddenly pulled out of a drive-through right in front of me several years ago, more worried about opening his coffee than if anyone might be coming up the road, got one hell of a wake-up when I moved his front sheet metal half a metre sideways. I’m on a Timmies run! The world stops for me! Back in traffic, it’s all about the coffee. When the liquid is not actually being consumed, the cup must be held at chin height, perhaps as a signal to fellow addicts. I just got Timmies! If we’re lucky, the other hand is on the steering wheel and not a cell phone. Sometimes you must make do, as an e-bike rider did in front of me the other day. As he drove down the wrong side of the road, and turned in front of me against a red light— fortunately for him, I was able to stop—he held the coffee cup in his mouth so he could use both hands to turn the corner. Everything stops for Timmies! And when the magical elixir is gone, when that paper cup is empty, chances are good it will be discarded on the run. If the driver is a slob, it will simply be tossed out the window. If the driver has some distorted sense of decency, it will be left standing neatly beside the car in a parking lot. If there’s still a sip or two left, it will be taken into the store, to be deposited amongst the consumer goods on the shelf. Because the cupholder in the car must be empty, it must be ready, it must be primed for that next mad dash to the drive-through, traffic and pedestrians be damned. Remember, folks: Tim Horton died in a car crash. Gotta get my Timmies! Tintapper1570
There’s a serious problem with drinking and driving on our roads these days, but it isn’t with alcohol. It’s coffee. Addled by double-doubles, blinded by the drive-through signs, these caffeine addicts are making it even harder to get through a day’s drive unscathed. And all because they must get Timmies!
You’re now taking your life in your hands if you walk or drive past one of these places. These addicts are so fixated on the driveway entrance, they seldom bother to glance sideways as they cross lanes and bludgeon their way through traffic. Must get Timmies! They’re oblivious to the screeching of brakes or the honking of horns, and if an oncoming vehicle happens to break through their hot-drink haze, they simply gaze blankly, as if someone has just chastised them for breathing. I’m going to get Timmies! Everyone else must stop for me! If there isn’t enough room for all the cars in the drive-through, as often happens, they simply line up six or seven deep on the street. Must get Timmies! If they’re turning left into the drive-through, they jam their cars sideways across the oncoming lanes and block the entire road, lest someone making a right-hand turn get in line before them. Must get Timmies! Even if there is oncoming traffic, they still snap their turn. You’ll stop before you T-bone me. I’m on my way for Timmies! Once they have their fix, they must now get back on the road. It’s not necessary to look both ways, or even stop if someone is coming. I have my Timmies. I am invincible. Of course, the one who suddenly pulled out of a drive-through right in front of me several years ago, more worried about opening his coffee than if anyone might be coming up the road, got one hell of a wake-up when I moved his front sheet metal half a metre sideways. I’m on a Timmies run! The world stops for me! Back in traffic, it’s all about the coffee. When the liquid is not actually being consumed, the cup must be held at chin height, perhaps as a signal to fellow addicts. I just got Timmies! If we’re lucky, the other hand is on the steering wheel and not a cell phone. Sometimes you must make do, as an e-bike rider did in front of me the other day. As he drove down the wrong side of the road, and turned in front of me against a red light— fortunately for him, I was able to stop—he held the coffee cup in his mouth so he could use both hands to turn the corner. Everything stops for Timmies! And when the magical elixir is gone, when that paper cup is empty, chances are good it will be discarded on the run. If the driver is a slob, it will simply be tossed out the window. If the driver has some distorted sense of decency, it will be left standing neatly beside the car in a parking lot. If there’s still a sip or two left, it will be taken into the store, to be deposited amongst the consumer goods on the shelf. Because the cupholder in the car must be empty, it must be ready, it must be primed for that next mad dash to the drive-through, traffic and pedestrians be damned. Remember, folks: Tim Horton died in a car crash. Gotta get my Timmies! You lost me at 'There's a serious problem'.
Sorry. ![]() P.s. If you put Tim Hortons I'd have known what you were talking about. Last edited by TimeBandits15969, 9 months ago i`m waiting for someone here to make a tutorial on how to press the letter A on my keyboard then i`m going to find the nearest blunt instrument and i`m going to cave my own skull in with it. The letter A is to the left of the letter S. ![]() ![]() [edit] do you need a thread? ![]() Last edited by PiratMas17878, 9 months ago Great post mas, thank you so very much (see, I used the letter "a" twice). |





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