Frank Zappa-You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol 1 [1988]

You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 1

(Zappa, 2CD, Rykodisc RCD 10081/82, May 9, 1988)


disc 1

1. The Florida Airport Tape (Volman/Kaylan/FZ) 1:03
2. Once Upon A Time 4:37
3. Sofa #1 2:53
4. The Mammy Anthem 5:41
5. You Didn't Try To Call Me 3:39
6. Diseases of The Band 2:22
7. Tryin' To Grow A Chin 3:44
8. Let's Make The Water Turn Black / Harry, You're A Beast / The Orange County Lumber Truck 3:28
9. The Groupie Routine 5:41
10. Ruthie-Ruthie (Brock/Berry) 2:57
11. Babbette 3:35
12. I'm The Slime 3:13
13. Big Swifty 8:47
14. Don't Eat The Yellow Snow 20:16

disc 2

1. Plastic People (FZ/Berry) 4:38
2. The Torture Never Stops 15:48
3. Fine Girl 2:55
4. Zomby Woof 5:39
5. Sweet Leilani (Owens) 2:39
6. Oh No 4:34
7. Be In My Video 3:29
8. The Deathless Horsie 5:29
9. The Dangerous Kitchen 1:49
10. Dumb All Over 4:20
11. Heavenly Bank Account 4:05
12. Suicide Chump 4:56
13. Tell Me You Love Me 2:09
14. Sofa #2 3:01

Produced, arranged, compiled and edited by Frank Zappa

Recording engineers: FZ, Mark Pinske, Mick Glossop, Dick Kunc, Barry Keene, Brian Krokus, Kerry McNab, Davey Moire
Remix engineers: Bob Stone, Mick Glossop
Remix facility: UMRK



disc 1

1. The Florida Airport Tape 1:03



(Volman/Kaylan/FZ)

An airport in Florida
June, 1970

FZ--voice
Mark Volman--voice
Howard Kaylan--voice
Jeff Simmons--voice
Aynsley Dunbar--voice
Unknown Guy--voice

(whistling)
Wha . . .
Mark: Can I just ask some, any, everybody here, did anybody see me puke on stage?
(Guy: What you doin', tourin' the country?)
Howard: No, did you ?
(Jeff: Yeah.)
Mark: I puked on stage
(Jeff: We started with San Antonio last night.)
Howard: You puked on stage?
(Jeff: . . . And then Atlanta, Tallahassee, Orlando, and then Jacksonville, and then we're doin' Europe. We have a few days off. We have about twenty days off [...] )
Mark: I did, man. I was sing . . . right in the middle of singin' "Easy Meat" or somethin', an' all of a sudden I started pukin' outta my mouth an' I just put my hand over my mouth, an' I had . . .
Howard: Ohhhh . . . Outta sight!
Aynsley: You didn't get it on film? . . . is that in slow motion . . .
(Guy: [...] pretty good.)
Mark: I thought you guys all caught that, man.
(Jeff: My name's Jeff.)
I got really sick from, you, know, all that jumpin' around and stuff . . . an' all that scotch and wine. Just weird, I only did it for about a second, y'know?
(Guy: Oh!)
Mark: It was just like a little spew.
(Guy: California?
Jeff: L.A., man.)
I kinda shoved it back down my throat and went on singin'
FZ: Great.
Howard: Phew . . . Yeah, that is strange, man. Ratso Rizzo
FZ: He saved it because he might be hungry later.
Howard: Eewwww . . . get the big pieces!

2. Once Upon A Time 4:37



Rainbow Theatre, London, UK
December 10, 1971

FZ--guitar/vocal
Mark Volman--vocal
Howard Kaylan--vocal
Jim Pons--bass/vocal
Don Preston--keyboards/electronics
Ian Underwood--keyboards/alto sax
Aynsley Dunbar--drums

translation

FZ: Once upon a time, way back a long time ago, when the universe consisted of nothing more elaborate than Mark Volman . . .
Mark: Ohh, thank you, Frank. And don't misspell it, that's not Marc Bolan, that's Mark Volman. Hiya, friends! I wanna welcome each an' every one of ya, I wanna say to you tonight, I feel great. I mean, I feel great! Everywhere I go people are always comin' up to me, and they say, "Mark . . . Mark, Mark"
(Mark! Mark! Mark!)
Mark: "Mark, are you kidding?" Lemme tell you this, friends: I AM NOT KIDDING. I mean, I am portly, and I am maroon. Well, how many people here tonight can guess what I am?
FZ: I . . . don't
Howard: I can't guess what you are.
Jim: Not me
Mark: Well, then I'll give you some clues. And the first clue is, I AM PORTLY. Does that help?
FZ: Not Much
Howard: No, I don't know who you are
Mark: OK, I got one. Clue number two: I AM DOUBLE KNIT. That helped?
FZ: No, not much
Howard: What do you mean?
Mark: Ahem; well then, I have to give you one more clue, I know this is gonna give it away and hate like damn to tell you this, but clue number three, ICH BIN MAROON.
Howard: Ahhhh, you're a Sofa!

FZ: Way back a long time ago, when the universe consisted of nothing more elaborate than Mark Volman . . .
Mark: Thank you, Frank
FZ: . . . trying to convince each and every member of this extremely hip audience here tonight that he was nothing more, nothing less, than a fat, maroon sofa, suspended in the midst of a great emptiness, a light shined down from Heaven. And there he was, ladies and gentlemen, the Good Lord, and he took a . . . he took a look at the sofa, and he said to himself: "Quite an attractive sofa. This sofa could be commercial . . . "
Mark: Thank you, Frank, hiya friends
FZ: " . . . with a few more margaritas and the right company. However, I digress. What this sofa needs," said the Big G., "is a bit of FLOORING underneath of it." And so, in order to make this construction project possible, he summoned the assistance of the celestial choir of engineers and, by means of a cute little song in the German language, which is the way he talks whenever it's Heavy Business, the Good Lord went something like this, take it away, Jim Pons:

Gib zu mir etwas Fu▀bodenbelag
(Hey!)
Unter diesen fetten, flie▀enden Sofa
(Everybody!)
Gib zu mir etwas Fu▀bodenbelag
Unter diesen fetten, flie▀enden Sofa

FZ: And of course, ladies and gentlemen, that means, "Give unto me a bit of flooring under this fat, floating sofa." And sure enough, boards of oak appeared thoughout the emptiness as far as vision permits, stretching all the way from Belfast to Bognor Regis. And the Lord put aside his huge cigar and proceeded to deliver unto the charming maroonish sofa the bulk of his message, with the assistance of a small electric clarinet, and it went something like this:

3. Sofa #1 2:53



* One Size Fits All
* Zappa In New York
* You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 1
* The Best Band You Never Heard In Your Life

Rainbow Theatre, London, UK
December 10, 1971

FZ--guitar/vocal
Mark Volman--vocal
Howard Kaylan--vocal
Jim Pons--bass/vocal
Don Preston--keyboards/electronics
Ian Underwood--keyboards/clarinet
Aynsley Dunbar--drums

translation

YEAH!

Ich bin der Himmel
Ich bin das Wasser
(I am the sky and the water)
Ich bin der Dreck unter deinen Walzen
Ich bin dein geheimer Schmutz
Und verlorenes Metallgeld
Metallgeld!
Unter deine Ritze
Ich bin deine Ritze und Schlitze

Ich bin Wolken
Ich bin bestickt
Ich bin der Autor aller Felgen
Und Damast Paspeln
Ich bin der Chrome Dinette
Ich bin der Chrome Dinette
Ich bin Eier aller Arten

Ich bin alle Tage und Nächte
Ich bin alle Tage und Nächte

Ich bin hier
Und du bist mein Sofa
(AIEE-AH!)
Ich bin hier
Und du bist mein Sofa
(AIEE-AH!)
Ich bin hier
Und du bist mein Sofa

Eddie, are you kidding me?
Eddie, are you kidding me?
Eddie, are you kidding me?

4. The Mammy Anthem 5:41



* Thing-Fish

Stadio Communale, Palermo, Sicily
July 14, 1982

FZ--lead guitar
Ray White--guitar
Steve Vai--stunt guitar
Tommy Mars--keyboards
Bobby Martin--keyboards/sax
Ed Mann--percussion
Scott Thunes--bass
Chad Wackerman--drums


5. You Didn't Try To Call Me 3:39



* Freak Out!
* The MOFO Project/Object (fazedooh)
* The MOFO Project/Object
* Cruising With Ruben & The Jets

Olympiahalle, Munich, Germany
July 3, 1980

FZ--guitar/vocal
Ike Willis--guitar/vocal
Ray White--guitar/vocal
Tommy Mars--keyboards
Arthur Barrow--keyboards/bass
David Logeman--drums

You didn't try to call me, why didn't you try?
I'm so lonely
No matter who I take home, I keep calling your name
And you, (I need you so bad) you're the one babe

Tell me, tell me who's lovin' you now
'Cause it worries my mind and I can't sleep at all
I stayed home on Friday just to wait for your call
And you didn't try to call me

Why didn't you try, I'm so lonely
No matter who I take home, I keep calling your name
And you, (I need you so bad) You're the one babe

Tell me, tell me who's lovin' you now
'Cause it worries my mind and I can't sleep at all
I stayed home on Friday just to wait for your call

I can't say what's wrong or what's right
La la-la-la la, la la-la-la la
All you've gotta do-do-do is call me babe
La la-la-la la, la la-la-la la

You make me feel so excited girl
I got so hung up on you from the moment that we met
That no matter how I try, I can't keep the tears
From running down my face
I'm all alone at my place

You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me at all . . . (didja, buddy?) didja?
You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me at all . . . didja?
You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me at all . . . didja?
You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me at all . . . or didja?

6. Diseases Of The Band 2:22


includes a quote from Wet T-Shirt Nite

Hammersmith Odeon, London, UK
February 19, 1979

FZ--guitar/vocal
Ike Willis--guitar/vocal
Denny Walley--slide guitar/vocal
Warren Cuccurullo--guitar
Tommy Mars--keyboards/vocal
Peter Wolf--keyboards
Ed Mann--percussion
Arthur Barrow--bass
Vinnie Colaiuta--drums/voice

FZ: Howdy, folks. Alright, here's the deal: This is our last show here in London. Gee, it's gonna be tough. Got a few-a few of the boys are sick tonight (cough, cough) but they're still gonna . . . GIVE YOU THEIR ALL. I want to introduce you to the members of the rocking teenage combo and tell you which ones are sick and what they've got. Denny Walley on slide and vocals, he has, he has an aluminum finger, and we're gonna have that removed a little bit later in the show. This is Ike Willis. Ike has a . . . now Ike, Ike is our, uh lead vocalist, our dynamic male vocalist, he's got a sore throat and all sorts of other things wrong with him, he'll never be able to get through the show. The only thing he's got to take care of him is his knitted hat. And of course, Tommy Mars who also has stomach flu, on keyboards. Eh, do you have any other diseases, Tommy? No? He's available. Okay. Ed Mann on percussion. Ed is still healthy. Except, and he told me this backstage, except for his mental health, which he hasn't been doin' . . . but you have to expect theses things in this kind of a group. And Peter Wolf on keyboards. There's, there apparently is nothing wrong with Peter yet.
Band Member #1: He's got stomach flu too.
FZ: You have stomach flu too? Ooh, my goodness.
Band Member #2: He has intestinal flu.
Band Member #3: The keyboard disease.
Band Member #1: They're coming up here . . .
FZ: The circle is closing in. Okay, Vince Colaiuta on drums. Now, as you can see from looking at Vince, there is absolutely nothing wrong with him.
Band Member #2: Malnutrition.
Vinnie: Hey, c'mon. I'm workin' on it.
FZ: Arthur Barrow, our bass player, he's got a, he's having a lot of trouble, he's been very sick all day, missed the soundcheck and everything, but he's gonna try, he's gonna try really hard. And of course, Sophia Warren on guitar.
7. Tryin' To Grow A Chin 3:44



* Läther
* Sheik Yerbouti
* You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 6

includes a quote from Wooly Bully (Samudio)

Hammersmith Odeon, London, UK
February 18, 1979, 2nd show

FZ--guitar/vocals
Ike Willis--guitar/vocals
Denny Walley--slide guitar/lead vocals
Warren Cuccurullo--guitar
Tommy Mars--keyboards/vocals
Peter Wolf--keyboards
Ed Mann--percussion
Arthur Barrow--bass
Vinnie Colaiuta--drums

Hey! I'm only fourteen
Sickly 'n thin
Tried all of my life
Just to grow me a chin
It popped out once
Yeah, but my dad pushed it in
Tell me, why did he hurt me?
Lord, he's my next of kin . . .
He's a mex-i-kin

I'm lonely 'n green;
Too small for my shirt
If Simmons was here
I could feature my hurt
Scared of the future
'N I hope I don't grow
Hey listen, I know nobody likes me
'Cause everywhere I go
They say NO
They say NO
They say NO
Agh!
They say NO

Now that I'm older
I got a place in the town, babe
I got a chin on my shoulder
'N it keeps growing down down down
Scared of the future
'N I wish I was dead
(Mattie told Hattie . . . )
Oh . . .
I'd rather be dead instead
Shit!
I'd rather be dead instead
Now dig this:

I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
(Mattie told Hattie . . . )
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me

One more time for the world!

I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I'd rather be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me

I'm horny 'n lonely too!

(Mattie told Hattie
About a thing she saw . . . )

8. Let's Make The Water Turn Black/Harry, You're A Beast/The Orange County Lumber Truck 3:28



* We're Only In It For The Money
* Ahead Of Their Time
* Make A Jazz Noise Here

includes Harry, You're A Beast and The Orange County Lumber Truck

The Ballroom, Stratford, Connecticut
February 16, 1969

FZ--guitar
Lowell George--guitar/gⁿiro
Roy Estrada--bass
Don Preston--keyboards/electronics
Buzz Gardner--trumpet
Ian Underwood--alto sax
Bunk Gardner--tenor sax
Motorhead Sherwood--tambourine
Jimmy Carl Black--drums
Arthur Dyer Tripp III--drums


9. The Groupie Routine 5:41


* Fillmore East, June 1971

includes a quote from Tell Me You Love Me

Pauley Pavillion, UCLA, California
August 7, 1971

FZ--guitar/vocal
Mark Volman--vocal
Howard Kaylan--vocal
Jim Pons--bass/vocal
Don Preston--keyboards/electronics
Ian Underwood--keyboards/alto sax
Aynsley Dunbar--drums

Mark: I mean really . . . Really!
Howard: Rant-ran-n-n-nant rant-rant-rant . . .
Mark: I mean, you guys, what can I say, you guys are my favorite band. You gotta tell me something . . . are you here in Hollywood long? I mean, I just . . .&#